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Wednesday, July 18, 2012

random thoughts about aidie's hideaway

my work table has had the same "new" washed and folded fabric neatly piled on it for over a month.
and it has been clean everyday for weeks.
a clean table is a sign of me not working.

i haven't thought much about work lately.
which is one of the things i have loved about this mini business of mine...
that i am able to work when i want to. take breaks when i need to.

my little man being on summer vacation has a big part to play in my lack of work.
i love summer. love the time with both kids.
and lets be real...
it takes a lot, a lot of work, to keep kids occupied over a summer break.
plus vacations... who doesn't love vacations.
i am more than grateful for them.

another reason i haven't been working much
could be due to the boutique that carried my line in our downtown area closing a few months ago.
so i don't have the demand of keeping them stocked up anymore.
part of me misses that and part of me does not.

then there is my etsy shop.
oh etsy. how you drive me crazy but i can't shut you down.
etsy has been up and down for me. there have been months where i've had great sales
and then months with zero. 
 it has always been consistent with one thing... inconsistency.
but i will give credit where credit is due,
etsy has brought me customers from all over the united states.

aidie's hideaway has been most successful at events
and in person to people i know or through locally referred customers.
but, in order to do that i have to be working. creating pieces and marketing them in some fashion.

i've realized that life goes on just fine when i am not at my work table daily.
my business may not go on fine, in a successful way of speaking, but real life does.
and just as real life goes on without me working, our bills do get paid and our family is fed
regardless of the amount of hair pretties, crowns and garlands i create and sell.

again to give credit where credit is due,
this is because my husband is a hard working amazing kind of man.
who i am ridiculously thankful for!

why am i sharing about all of this?
i'm not totally sure.
it has probably come from me finally taking notice that i have not "worked" in weeks
and feeling a little like i should explain myself.
i've also had a few people recently ask about my little business.
how is it doing? are things selling? am i enjoying it? is it all worth it?

the one question that i know the answer to, is that i do enjoy it.
i enjoy creating things with my hands. i enjoy handmade things.
and i enjoy making handmade things for others.

the other questions about sales, success and worth, i don't have great answers for.
my business is tiny.
it's all up to me most of the time.
the more time i put into it, the more i can get out of it.
have i tried to get my line into another shop? no.
do i scout out local events and boutiques i could sell at? no.
am i working everyday to design new pieces? no.

should i be doing all of those things? i don't know.

this little business of mine started on its own.
it wasn't some great plan or childhood dream i had.
so maybe it has now reached that place where it either naturally plateaus here
that place where i have to put myself out there for it to grow more.
do i want it to grow? i am not sure.
it depends in what ways we are talking about growth.

so maybe i just need better direction.
a reason to sit at my table and create.
more reason than just the occasional desire and need to use my hands.
more reason than an upcoming event to stock up for.
more reason than keeping a retail space in a shop stocked.
more reason than saving up to buy me an ipad with my own earned money.
something that makes me excited to work. to create.
maybe even something that brings joy.
a greater joy than someone getting to wear or decorate with my handmade items.

i feel like i am getting somewhere now with these random thoughts.
i truly sat down to write this post with zero direction.
this has probably proved obvious while you've been reading.

maybe i am feeling called to change it up a little bit.
called to step our of my comfort zone.
called to use these two hands that enjoy to create for others,
for something bigger than what aidie's hideaway naturally was born out of and into.

this is the longest i have gone without "working" since it all began.
it has felt like a very natural and needed break.
i can't ignore the feeling i have for some sort of change to take place.

but what change?

i do feel like the change is going to be in the direction of finding
a greater purpose for my creations and the time i spend creating them.
better direction for my desire and need to make handmade things.
using these gifts for something more.

how would i do that?

 i don't have the skills, desire, or time, to start up a non-profit of sorts.
but i could choose an organization to give aidie's hideaway profits to.
but isn't this already being done all over the place by so many people/businesses?
don't get me wrong, i am aware that there is always more needs to be met in these places.
but is that the direction i am feeling called to?
i don't want to make some quick decision just for the sake of change.
i want  it to be the right change for the right reason.

these are all things i will be thinking and praying about.

thanks for reading this random piece of honesty about my little business.
i would enjoy reading your thoughts, feedback or words of wisdom.
maybe from those who have been in a similar place before.
maybe from those who have invested in my handmade items before.
or from those of you who know me personally in real life... and can speak into this.

 but for now,
i am going to enjoy the rest of this summer, and this break from "work", with my family.

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